Tuesday 24 April 2012

Same script..different cast

Her soul sags with exhaustion, her zip loosens slowly as a tear shed from each eye..Why do they force her to smile when her heart bleeds as they wrongly interpret the look on her oval face? She wishes they’ll really mean it when they ask ‘how are you’, she puts her hands over her mouth to reduce her scream as she shivers to her knees, she turns up the radio volume when the music plays, just so no one can hear her yell. She longs to hear a different knock at her door asides that of her landlord’s. Shes got pretty sofas and colorful drapes but asides herself, no one else knows how beautiful they are.
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He’s been away for so long as you wonder how much more loneliness you can take, you are almost losing your mind. you fill your heart with the memories of his last visit, his last touch, his last kiss on your lips, his whispers in  your ears still resounds and now you relish his bad morning breath, one you couldn’t once bear, you cannot but bear the truth that waiting for him is like a drop of rain in the desert.
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You look lost as you watch the empty swing swaying back and forth at your backyard cos you are that sad wife that commends her husband for his faithfulness . .you got a room all painted in bright colors at your pent house hoping someday the cry of your baby would be like sweet music to your ears.
*                   *              *             *           *            *               *                   *   
You’ve been loving him for two years and counting..and you wonder when he’ll put the ring on it, you have given him everything, your soul, your body, your money and what has he given? You ask yourself often and often..why am I still with his sorry ass’’ but walking out that door is a bold step you don’t yet have the courage to take..you want him to bring it? Why would he when he gets everything for free? why should he buy a cow and you’ve been giving him the meat for free..these burning words from your sister on her last visit still resounds in your ears..
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You’ve been hurt one too many times and atlas, you have placed a bullet proved door at the gates of your heart. You scrutinize them thoroughly and have a NO GO sign at d top of your head. Your father’s prophesies and your mother’s rants about how all her friends will tie red george wrapper and gold blouse to the wedding makes you believe they are crazy, in fact, you are certain they are cos you know you got no man, your heart skips at the next wedding invite you receive and you’ve just done you last maid of honor and bride’s maid duties for the last time for a lifetime.
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You want to smile cos your heart bleeds no more, you’ve had one too many visitors and your sofa doesn’t look as new anymore and the music has never been as loud as your laughter, though your landlord’s knock is still the hardest at your door, you only feel sorry for his fist cos the bullet proved door once at your heart has now been relocated to your door step. You have them too many baby girls already and now as it seems your wish list is endless , you want a boy, and you bet the recent morning sickness you’ve been having is a sign that the boy’ is one the way.
This time the waiting ended, he dint come home but you went home……
You finally got the bold steps to walk through those doors, cos still, you never got the ring but then, you realized how stupid you had been…
Just as you’ve always dreamt, it was on a weird sunset Tuesday, on a garden filled with fire lamps and scented candles, in midst of loved ones, ofcourse, with the head gears of your mother's friends causing so much distraction, their red george wrapper and gold blouse is a total contrast to your theme color, but under that scenery, did you tie the knot with the soul that mates your heart.

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